Starting Over

Ch. 9

He wakes in a pile of rubble and suddenly he's searching for her, she must be here. She was next to him during.... during the explosion. He's tossing aside pieces of cement and other materials like legos, then he sees her. Blood seeping onto concrete, darker than her hair. He sees her shallow breathing, as he pulls the last pillar off of her small frame. He watches her eyes flutter open and settle in on him, and he's trying to assess her injuries. There's too many to count. He's sure.
"Steve?"
"Hey... don't try to talk okay?" He says applying pressure to her wounds with one hand the other touching the side of her face. "Helps coming."
"We both know they won't make it in time..." she says, tears cloud his vision.
"Hey don't say that... you're gonna be fine..." he says wiping a few tears that escape her eyes.
"Just promise me you'll take care of her..." she begs "she doesn't need to be alone. She'll want to but..." she says eyes getting heavier
"Hey! stay with me..." he begs, she squeezes his hand as she shuts her eyes. 

Steve awakens in a sweat, clutching at the neck of his t-shirt- too tight. He feels like he's suffocating, a few tears escape his eyes as he struggles to catch his breath.
"Friday?" He asks "Where's Natasha ?"
"Agent Romanoff is currently asleep, sir. Should I wake her?"
"No.... Friday. No, I'm good. Thanks." He manages to get out, she's okay.
He runs a hand over his face before checking the clock, it's currently 2 a.m.
He knows there will be no going back to sleep. He makes his way to the gym, the best way for him to clear his head.
He swings repetitively at the bag, the one's designed for him, not bothering to wrap his hands.  He's been through 3 when picks up on quiet footsteps down the hall.

"Again" the voice says. Her feet have gone numb long ago, the pale pink of her point shoes turned a deep red. Still she repeats it multiple times, this is what she has been trained for. The other girls continue as well, until they collapse. She almost did as well, her 10 year old body is not meant for such rigorous activities. Still she some how manages to keep standing, pirouette after pirouette. " Natalia, you may stop now." The small red head stops abruptly, she notices she is no longer surrounded by the others. "Come here." The woman says "You have gone much farther than I have thought possible." She says "With the right training you will make a wonderful ballerina."  The red head nods, small curls falling out of the bun one of the older girls had fastened on the top of her head. "do you know what we do here?" She asks
"No Madame." Natalia replies fingers dancing on the hem of her leotard.
"We make the best, not just the best ballerinas. There's someone I want you to meet..."

And suddenly she's snapped from her dream. Shaking, Natasha sats up on her bed. She has had this dream multiple times and never got to the ending before her mind took her away. The memory was hazy to say the least, she sighed pulling herself out of bed for a glass of water. She slowly took sips from the glass.
"Friday, is Steve still asleep?" She asked
"No Ms. Romanoff, Captain Rogers has been awake for approximately 1 hr."
"Thanks, Fri." Natasha sat her glass down glancing  at the clock on her kitchen counter, 3 a.m.
She silently made her way to the elevator, praying that thoughts plaguing her mind did not disrupt the girl sleep in the next room. The last thing she needed was to wake the teen on the one night she hadn't had a nightmare. She knew where he'd be. It wouldn't be the first time she had found him in the gym, knuckles bloodied, hazy eyes taking out his nightmare and frustrations out on a punching bag. She approached the gym quietly.
"What'd that bag ever do to you?" She asks as she enters the room, trying to lighten the atmosphere. He doesn't acknowledge her but rather sends another punch to the bag knocking it over and replacing it with another.
"What are you doing here ,Romanoff?" He asks hanging the new bag
"Couldn't sleep..." she replies crossing the room to stand closer to him
"Nightmares?" He asks, gaze softening a bit.
She nods approaching him, grabbing the towel that rests near his water bottle.
"You should really wrap your hands next time you decide to destroy all the punching bags..." Natasha says grabbing his hands and softly wiping away at the blood that covers his knuckles.
"You're always taking care of me." He says taking the now clean hand out of her grasp as she reaches for the other.
"Someone's got to..." she teases, moving her eyes up to meet his.
He smiles, cause she's here and she's makes everything better. Yet he's suddenly aware of how he felt an hour ago, so scared of losing her.
He reaches a hand out to rest on her hip, keeping her in front of him.
"What would I do without you?" He asks.
"I don't know..." she replies smile as genuine as the one he wears.

He's suddenly aware of how close they're standing, faces inches apart. He's not sure which one of them leans in first, hearts beating fast. He's kissed her before, that time in the mall and for undercover missions but this was completely different because this was them, just Steve and Natasha. Their breathe mingles as both lean in. Steve fully prepares himself because let's be honest he's been dying to kiss her for awhile now.

She feels his hand on her hip, the way he pulls her closer as if he's scared she'll leave. Like she could, her hearts belonged to him for a long time now. Suddenly they're both leaning in, eager to close the gap between them. She's wanted to kiss him, really kiss him for a long time. She's inches away from him now. Then lips barely apart,slightly brushing. You don't deserve him. She pulls away, falling back on her heals.

"I'm sorry... I didn't even ask... I shouldn't have tried to..." Steve rambles, face blushing
"No, Steve it's not that." She reassures him placing a hand on the side of his face. "It's not you, I just I don't want to mess this up...."
He nods but she noticed the way his face falls a little at the words
"I don't want to ruin what we have because I don't deserve you, because I can't give you everything you've ever dreamed of." She continues, a tear escapes  the corner of her eye
"You think you're not enough?" He asks squeezing her hip, silence is his response.
"You are more than enough for me." He says and pulling her against his chest.
"You wanna know why I never said yes to any of those dates you were always trying to set me up on? Because I was hoping maybe one day I'd head your name on the list. I know you're probably not ready to start a relationship right now. Things are finally working out with Wanda and a she's adjusting, so are you. But, Nat, I'm so love with you. I have been for a long time now, I was just scared to admit it." He feels her tears against his chest "I'll wait for you. Until you're ready, I'll wait for you."
"Someday." Natasha replies "I promise."
Steve nods his head, placing a kiss to her forehead "someday..."

Sorry this chapter is kind of short, but I really thought this was the perfect way to end it. Let me know your thoughts and if you have any suggestions in the comments. Thanks! -musicgirl145