Three years of Almost

Chapter 19

You stared at the screen glowing in the dark. Twenty messages. All from Stacey.

Your throat tightened, your vision blurring, but it wasn’t the petals this time. Just raw, aching emotion.

You clutched the small vial in one hand—the last drop of Seulgi’s anti-faint tonic—and your phone in the other, trembling. Jennie's words echoed like a curse in your head:

"Decide whether to tell her the truth… or let her fall in love with someone who might not be around long enough... You'll die."

The moment cracked something inside you.

A sob escaped your lips, and you curled into yourself on the bed. Silent, stifled cries broke through your chest. You felt like a child again—powerless, desperate, terrified.

Why you?

Why now, just when Stacey was slowly, finally turning toward you again?

Why does love come with a clock ticking too fast?

You whispered, brokenly, into the dark.

“Bakit gan’to…?” your voice trembled. “Ang selfish ko, ‘di ba, Mochi? Gusto ko siya… gusto ko siya sa tabi ko. Pero… what if I’m just dragging her into my ending?”

Mochi meowed softly from her little bed by the dresser, padding over and nuzzling your hand.

“I like her… sobra,” you sniffled, voice cracking. “But… kung pipiliin ko sarili ko, I might lose her. Kung pipiliin ko siya… I might not even make it kasi mawawala ko pa rin siya because she doesn't even like me.”

You clutched the anti-faint vial tighter, knuckles white.

“Three days. Pang tatlong araw na lang 'tong vial…” you whispered. “Hindi pa ako handa na ako mismo umiwas sakaniya.”

The room was quiet, save for the sound of your shaky breathing, your tears falling freely now.

And your phone buzzed again, lighting up with Stacey’s name.

This one wasn’t just a message.

“Can we talk? Call?”

You stared at the screen, your heart a wreck.

Your thumb hovered over the answer button for a heartbeat too long.

Then, click.

“Hello?” Your voice came out softer than you intended—rough around the edges, shaky, like it had been caught in a storm.

There was silence on the other line for a second.

“Y/N?”

Stacey's voice. Gentle. Cautious. And somehow, it made your tears threaten to fall again.

“Yeah, hey,” you replied quickly, forcing a breath and trying to steady your tone. “Sorry, I—I was just feeding Mochi kanina. Napagod siguro sa biyahe.”

Another pause. She didn’t speak right away.

“…Are you crying?”

You blinked fast, your grip on the blanket tightening. “Ha? Hindi ah. Allergies lang. You know, umuulan lately tapos I broke a glass kanina. Baka napasma ako.”

There was a quiet exhale from Stacey. “You don’t have to lie, Y/N.”

“I’m not—” your voice cracked on the last syllable, betraying you.

“Hey,” she said gently, “It’s okay… I just… I wanted to talk to someone. It’s been a mess lately. And I dunno, you’re the only one who doesn't look at me with pity. I'm on my way ha?”